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Sithblade
02-20-2002, 09:35 PM
My "Tom Jones song" thread reminds me of something else notable that happened while I was in Zakhintos (probably the most beautiful of the Greek Isles, BTW, IMOHO images/icons/wink.gif)

My bros and I were walking down this strip to the beach (a 2-mile-long road of nothing but bars, dance-clubs and restaurants), and this one place my buddy Kyle stopped at the day before had this cute Aussie chick working there and he started talking with her again, and the fact that I no longer drink came up somehow. She commented that she could probably drink me under the table, to which I replied, "Well, once you drink me under the table, Hon.."..(wait for it)....
.
.
.
.
.
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"What will we do when we get there?" images/icons/rolleyes.gif images/icons/wink.gif(BOOYAH! images/icons/grin.gif)

I thought it was a good one. It DID get me a couple of wet ones from her.(KISSES! Get your minds outta the gutter, people! images/icons/wink.gif)


That's one of the few good "on-the-spot epiphany" comebacks I've ever had, and I still think it's good. images/icons/cool.gif


Anyone else want to share their moment of self-described "brilliance"? images/icons/rolleyes.gif images/icons/wink.gif

[ 02-20-2002: Message edited by: Sithblade316 ]

Jango_Fettish
02-20-2002, 09:43 PM
Alison fell for my "Wanna go to my place and see my toy collection?" line.

She thought I was kidding........ images/icons/grin.gif images/icons/blush.gif

LandotheScoundrel
02-20-2002, 09:54 PM
"wanna see my tattoo?" And she did. images/icons/wink.gif

_Spirit_of_
02-20-2002, 09:58 PM
The one time I actually tried a "one-liner", and it worked?.....I can't post it here images/icons/grin.gif.

02-20-2002, 10:06 PM
Well, since I normally didn't use lines to pick up girls images/icons/wink.gif, I can't really answer, but I can tell you about the worst one that was used on *me*. "Hey, I've got a friend that wants to ask you out." Smart me images/icons/rolleyes.gif replied that I was sorry, but that I was dating a guy who was stationed in Germany. Lucky for me, he saw me out with another guy (I wasn't really serious with the guy in Germany) a week or so later and he figured that if I would go out with that guy, that he had a chance so he asked me out.
Oh, and I ended up marrying him anyway- bad line and all. images/icons/grin.gif

[ 02-20-2002: Message edited by: purple4lee ]

Rogue9Horn
02-20-2002, 10:29 PM
images/icons/blush.gif Aww man! Now I'm going to have to wear a sack on my head at Celebration 2 images/icons/frown.gif

02-20-2002, 11:44 PM
images/icons/grin.gif

Redgek
02-21-2002, 12:39 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by -Spirit-of-:
The one time I actually tried a "one-liner", and it worked?.....I can't post it here images/icons/grin.gif.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Did it start with the word "wanna?" images/icons/grin.gif

Jedi_Idej
02-21-2002, 01:04 AM
"Are you an angel".

"I'm a pilot you know".

"Sandstorms are very, very dangerous. C'mon, I'll take you to my place".

I wish I never showed George Lucas my diary.

Jango_Fettish
02-21-2002, 12:48 PM
I forgot to mention, my fiance was'nt hooked by my SW collection.

It was my extensive Yanni and Gino Vanelli vinyl assortment.

"Yanni at the Acropolis"..Groovy. images/icons/cool.gif

_Spirit_of_
02-21-2002, 02:18 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Redgek:


Did it start with the word "wanna?" images/icons/grin.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Nope. The first word is "I", and you have to use it at just the right time, with the right woman, or all hell could break loose! images/icons/smile.gif

02-22-2002, 01:30 AM
I rarely use lines on guys...well, sometimes, if he's really cute and I'm really, uh, drunk. But I've heard that "Hey, I'm a pilot" line SO many times. I went to McKendree College in Lebanon, IL which is thisclose to Scott AFB. I swear every guy around my age who was stationed at Scott was a pilot. Yeah right. I FINALLY figured out that they were probably the ones that cleaned the planes or changed the oil or something. But the pilot line worked on me - oh, I was young and naive... images/icons/grin.gif

JBWS
02-22-2002, 01:50 AM
My best line would have to be:

"Sure, I'd like to buy some cookies!"

SpaceGhost2K
02-23-2002, 05:27 AM
"You didn't think you'd get out of here without skating the couple's skate, didja?"

One I wish I'd tried (different time):
"You wanna get out of here?"

ezehogan
02-23-2002, 06:38 PM
"Hey my name's Eric but you can call me tonight."

02-23-2002, 06:40 PM
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by ezehogan:
"Hey my name's Eric but you can call me tonight."<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh dude. I think I know you. images/icons/wink.gif I lived in St. Louis from the late '80s through the mid-'90s. images/icons/grin.gif

02-24-2002, 11:43 PM
" What's a crappy chick like you doing in a nice place like this?" No It's not a misprint, it really works for me. images/icons/cool.gif
Note: For your own safety, better have a grin on your face when you say it. images/icons/wink.gif

SAX
02-25-2002, 01:09 AM
On a Pacific Cruise in January '99....14 days of Duty Free Alcohol.....and I came up with....

"The word for today is legs. So, how about you come back to my cabin and we'll spread the word..." images/icons/grin.gif

Cheers, images/icons/cool.gif

JesseJames
02-25-2002, 02:11 AM
"Japanese*******WonderStud"

HAHAHAHAHA

Stormtripper
02-25-2002, 02:38 AM
Did you know I can lick my eyebrows and breath through my ears !!!!!

SAX
02-25-2002, 03:37 AM
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Stormtripper:
Did you know I can lick my eyebrows and breath through my ears !!!!!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

ROFLMAO!!!!

Sir, do you mind if I borrow that one this weekend???

4__LOSW
02-25-2002, 03:44 AM
A girl asked me why I wore my pants so low and I responded "Easy access,baby"(a line from rap star Eazy-E if you recall)
She blushed and laughed and then about 2 hrs later,I was in it too win it!
Now I'm married so no more pickup lines...oh well images/icons/wink.gif

02-25-2002, 12:53 PM
I got into a tussle with a kid the other day in TRU over the last Eeth Koth.After pushing him through a pyramid display of Barbie dolls
I quoted "Never f*ck with a Jedi Master" - Mark Hamil - Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back ah hah! images/icons/grin.gif

02-25-2002, 07:13 PM
"I'll buy that for a dollar!"

Sithblade
03-31-2002, 03:55 AM
Here's a new one, but it's not so much a "best line" as it is a one-liner(and I hope it doesn't get the thread locked up images/icons/wink.gif ).

We had an "ice cream social" (I know, it sounds pretty gay) on the ship one night while we were out on maneuvers, and I was sitting with my friend Jilon and a couple of the girls I work with. The two I work with were talking about overhearing some comments by two other girls about allowing their boyfriends to have "backdoor entry", if you know what I mean. Anyway, Celeste and Nicole, the girls in my work center, go to get more ice cream (Me and Jil were just drinking coffee) and her and I are sitting there, and I commented that I was surprised the girls were comfortable discussing this topic in front of a guy. Jil says something to the effect of ", Oh, I'm totally cool with it." And I'm not sure why, but I just blurted out:

"So, You're INTO @nal, then?"

She was struggling to keep from shooting coffee out her nose!! images/icons/grin.gif She would've probably killed me if she weren't laughing so hard! images/icons/grin.gif LOL

[ 03-31-2002, 02:58 AM: Message edited by: Sithblade316 ]

Sprry75
03-31-2002, 08:38 PM
Hey, JediIdej, your post got me in trouble at school. I was reading in the library and laughed way too loud.

Sithblade316, you should work that into a screenplay. That's pretty classic.

The most success I ever had came one day when there was a blood drive at my school. I knew I was going to be working with this hot chick after my last class, so I went up to the "treat" table and snagged one of those stickers that said "Kiss Me, I Gave Blood Today" and put it on.*

I went into work that afternoon, she saw it, and started a relationship that has gone on for over four years, including marriage and a kid images/icons/grin.gif .

* I usually give blood anyway, but I couldn't because I'd recently returned from overseas.

03-31-2002, 09:27 PM
Originally posted by Sprry75:
[QB]

I went into work that afternoon, she saw it, and started a relationship that has gone on for over four years, including marriage and a kid images/icons/grin.gif .

[QB]<font size="2" face="arial">Wow. What a skank! images/icons/wink.gif

Sithblade
03-31-2002, 11:46 PM
Screenplay?

What do you mean, Ryan? images/icons/confused.gif

Sithblade
10-28-2002, 11:41 PM
Okay, then...

Since the last time I posted on this thread, I've pretty much become an irreppentant smart*****. Here a new one..

A couple of months ago, the subject of cannibalism came up (don't ask me how, I think maybe somebody had just rented "Alive" or something) Anywho, my friend Troy mentioned that the fattest person in a group would be the best "choice", because the "meat" would retain a lot of moisture or something. Then Nicole (from the ice cream entry above, and yeah, she's kinda heavy, too) said that she would definitely be willing to sacrifice herself so others wouldn't have to die. So once again, Yours truly, had ANOTHER one pop into his head, and I let her have it!:

"Yeah, You WOULD do anything to get eaten!"

The smart***** comeback king strike again!!! images/icons/grin.gif images/icons/grin.gif

I've been unstoppable ever since! images/icons/grin.gif

[ 10-29-2002, 02:15 AM: Message edited by: Sithblade316 ]

Dain_Bramage
10-29-2002, 12:08 AM
The classic Joey Tribiani...

How YOU doin?

Virex
10-29-2002, 12:12 AM
Seinfeld's on the brain:

George Costanza: I'm George. I'm unemployed, and I live with my parents.

Girl: I'm so-and-so. Hi!

ezehogan
10-29-2002, 12:32 AM
Well, I'm pretty sure there is an old thread on this buried here somewhere.

Anyway, I made the old HS yearbook with the line:

"Hey, my name's Eric, but you can call me tonight."

Sithblade
10-29-2002, 03:18 AM
Uh, yeah, you posted it on this one. images/icons/rolleyes.gif

Take a look up the page, EZE. images/icons/rolleyes.gif images/icons/wink.gif

Chewbacca
10-29-2002, 03:47 AM
"I own a digital camera and a website." images/icons/tongue.gif images/icons/shocked.gif

JBWS
10-29-2002, 04:05 PM
My girlfriend and I were otu at a dance club last night. There was this guy there who looked like he had stepped right out of a Miami Vice episode. He had on light blue pants, a light blue sports jacket rolled up to his elbows, an orange wife-beater, and a gold cross. He'd been eyeing Stacy all night, and while I was going to the bathroom, he came over and "accidentally" spilt his drink on her. He then grabbed a napkin and said "here, you're all wet, let me wipe that up." She said no, and that it was okay. He then said, "well, since you don't mind, let me take you back to my place and I can get you real wet." He was saying this last bit just as I came back. If I'da been drinking I woud have just coldcocked the guy, but I've been working on my temper lately, so I just asked him if there was a problem. He said that I was the problem, and that I should go away so he can show my girl what it's like to be with a real man. That's when Stacy told him that if he was a real man, he wouldn't need a drink to make her wet. I missed the first part of the conversation, so I didn't know what she meant, but Miami Vice did, and he seemed a little pissed. He stood there for a second trying to think of a comeback, then called me an a-hole, and walked away. After that we left and ran to Denny's for nachos and shakes, and she explained the whole thing.

ezehogan
10-30-2002, 01:15 AM
LOL oh....... this IS that old thread.

Well, I blame this one on ignorance.

10-30-2002, 11:10 AM
I usually don't need any lines. Here's a sample exchange:

Me: (slight wave of the hand) You're going to come back to my place and get undressed...

Pause

Beautiful Woman: I'm going to come back to your place and get undressed...

It's just that simple! Try it sometime!

Figurewraith
10-30-2002, 02:58 PM
Originally posted by Virex:
Seinfeld's on the brain:

George Costanza: I'm George. I'm unemployed, and I live with my parents.

Girl: I'm so-and-so. Hi!<font size="2" face="arial">I tell girls sometimes that my name is Art Vandelay and that I'm an architect images/icons/grin.gif images/icons/tongue.gif

10-30-2002, 03:12 PM
So, have you ever done it below deck on a sailboat?

Jedi_Turok
10-31-2002, 07:10 PM
Originally posted by MXIG88:
I usually don't need any lines. Here's a sample exchange:

Me: (slight wave of the hand) You're going to come back to my place and get undressed...

Pause

Beautiful Woman: I'm going to come back to your place and get undressed...

It's just that simple! Try it sometime!<font size="2" face="arial">MXIG88 that is great!

If you ask woman on a date and she says "I have a boy friend" just say " Well how long have you had this problem" you are going to get a smile in the worst case.....but it usually ends up a date for me....

10-31-2002, 08:18 PM
The classic Joey Tribiani...

How YOU doin? <font size="2" face="arial">Thats classic! I use it all the time. images/icons/grin.gif images/icons/wink.gif images/icons/smile.gif

Sithblade
11-04-2002, 09:53 PM
Hey, folks,

Just got back from Las Vegas sunday night. It was my first visit there. Wild place...

Anywho, my latest entry isn't as creative as the others, but it's opener that went VERY far images/icons/wink.gif ...

"Nice butterfly." (it was a tattoo on her shoulder images/icons/grin.gif )

I spent the next 2 days with Maya. images/icons/smile.gif http://www.plauder-smilies.de/devil/sawink2.gif (turns out she's from Chula Vista)

Matt_Fury
11-04-2002, 11:45 PM
I either say "Hello", "Hi, I'm Matt", or "Hey wanna dance?"

If I get a no answer I walk away....their loss.

Chewbacca
11-05-2002, 12:48 AM
Originally posted by MXIG88:
I usually don't need any lines. Here's a sample exchange:

Me: (slight wave of the hand) You're going to come back to my place and get undressed...

Pause

Beautiful Woman: I'm going to come back to your place and get undressed...

It's just that simple! Try it sometime!<font size="2" face="arial">Thanks a lot! images/icons/mad.gif Now I still haven't hooked up with her and on top of that, I'm doubled over with badly bruised nuts! images/icons/wink.gif

[ 11-04-2002, 11:48 PM: Message edited by: Chewbacca the Hanging Chad ]